Something not Asia

Everytime I ask my grandma to eat that slice of pizza because she hadn’t had dinner yet, she would give a face that makes you think you’re serving her a piece of human skin with bloody intestines all over it. You know, those HOLY SHIT! kind of face.

The thing is, since she’s already like what? A octogenarian? She ought to taste different things before, you know, people don’t just live forever and ever.

Pizza Hut the other time was running 2 for $22 pizzas and I’ve got Hawaiian Pan delievered to my place. After the routine of “Do you want to eat?”, holy-shit-Face, “Try!”, holy-shit-Face, “Just try, it is nice”, holy-shit-Face, I finally managed to get her eat that piece before I dehydrate from my mouth.

And she loves it.

So I came home from school today and since no one cooked. I did.

I visited the supermarket yesterday and I grabbed a bottle of Prego’s tomato puree sauce for pasta, some spaghetti, bucket of ice-cream, toothbrush, tubes of toothpaste and cereal, I realized I overestimated myself - the things started falling everywhere because I was carrying all with my hand. Damn. No basket. Damn. CHECK OUT. NOW.

I cooked spaghetti for my lunch and it taste good. Hey, I didn’t screw things up and blow up the entire god-damn kitchen okay. I just burned my finger. But hey, its superficial. Again, I got my grandma to try and she gave me that HOLY SHIT! face again. But I still managed to get her to try, then she was all,

“it would be better with tomato sauce.”

THAT WHOLE BOTTLE I USED WAS TOMATO SAUCE.

“no, our tomato sauce is better.”

NO! YOU DON’T EAT WITH THAT TOMATO SAUCE.

But alas, she still shook a few globs of that Maggie Tomato sauce before exclaiming how nice it is. Whatever, as long as she get to taste what italian food it was. And good thing she likes it. My younger brother loves it, too. Ahem. See, I don’t cook bad.

So for now, I won’t be expecting anymore HOLY SHIT! kind of faces until I think of something else to let her try. Maybe I’ll get rice gratin for her. Next time.

Impossibilities.

When I finally boarded the last bus yesterday night, I couldn’t help but to be so immerse with the cool breeze and tranquility of the surrounding. Perhaps it is because day and night these days had been so hectic. Most mornings, afternoons and evenings are spent in school while the nights are spent doing projects and overdue assignments at home.

I was at Starbucks Orchard until 11pm and when I finally reached Tampines, it was midnight. The shops had their shutter pulled down, the chairs in the coffeeshop upturned, the cranes towering over a mess of unfinished steel at the construction site was unmoving. The clouds hovered beneath galaxies and stars. The stillness was surreal. The absence of motion in the surrounding make it look like a photograph.

Everyone else walked my direction; all heading home - looking forward to a hot shower, husbands would ask their kids if they had poop’d and spank them if they had not, wives would heat up the dinner and ask if they had mistress, grannies would have turned in for the night, teenagers would have been happily glued to their blogs and Messegners, and… just about anything in folkstale that ends with “happily ever after.”

Me?

Walking home after a exhausting in school, rushed for my project without dinner, headed home for a quick shower and then the projects again. Just like some bad boys in movies trying to rob the Federal Reserves. So hectic. So action-packed. So dire. So exaggerated. So MISSION IMPOSSIBLE.

At 2:30 am I was still touching up my project and the night was so quiet. The leaves fluttered. The ocassional wind brough up my curtain. The bugs outside slept so soundly they had forgotten to croak all night. My project still unfinished. My stomach was groaning, but the tiredness stalls it all.

At 9:00 am I sat for my test and it was smooth sailing despite the fact I hadn’t even studied as much as I was supposed to. The rest of the day today drew a blank to me because I exhuastion had consumed me entirely. All I remembered was that I watched three episodes of One Tree Hill while in school.

Tomorrow is another dire and dreadful day. Even though school ends as early as 11 am, I couldn’t afford to rest. It is about projects. It is about test. It is about assignments. It is about how mission impossible it is.

But all in all, my best companion in all these shit are espresso.

In Short

1. Yesterday and the day before felt like shit because I think I had throat inflammation again and I could taste the pus at night. And at one point in time, swallowing my own saliva was such a pain I thought I was going to die.
    
2. My T4215 is getting really unstable and I think the Hard Disk is going to crash anytime soon. I am trying to back up all my data at like such an ungodly hour because I couldn’t afford to lose a single byte of my data. Look, Internet, if you’re in my position, you’ll know your project files mattered more than the lives of your whole family added together.
    
3. I submitted my application for the Youth Expedition Project and I really hope I get shortlisted again. I was shortlisted last March but I pass it because none of my other classmates were shortlisted. But this time is different, I would want to go whether or not my classmates are going.
    
4. Being someone who takes taxi frequently since enrolling into polytechnic, I couldn’t help but to be so ridiculed by the extra fuel-surcharge of 30 cents. Like fuel-surcharge?! The last time I heard of fuel-surcharge was my air ticket!
    
5. Sabeela made a header for me and I have used it for my July header. Internet, she’s got really a thing in designing! She did all her Summer Lies blog designs and each time she changes, it seem to get only better. Like so delicious I wanted to eat - if I could.
    
6. Last but not least, each day I go to school, I found myself praying harder and harder for Armageddon. Like I hope for rain, then thunderstorms, tornadoes, floods, bright flashes, then we’re all going to die.
    
7. To so-and-so: Oh please! It is not like ALL OF US never regretted working with you. So stop talking like we are chaining you to a underground bunker, pulling out all of your nails and use chopsticks to stab your exceptionally hairy eyeballs while getting a dog humphing you.
    
   Because I doubt anyone on this surface of the planet would talk school work with you 60 minutes an hour, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.Oh yeah, WE ARE ALL GOING TO COPY YOUR WORK. Oh, I don’t think we are going to copy now. WE ARE GOING TO REPLICATE YOUR WORK. Smile!

Serious Shit

When I say I am quite sick of this thing called, school.

I am dead serious.

Although I know time passes very fast and all these projects and exams shit will be over in a jiffty, I just couldn’t help to hope for the world would come to an end now. NOW. Like everyone would die; and the first group to be drowned in floods would be polytechnic lecturers.

And the next group? You guess it.

Get me out of this shit, Internet.

5/10 July

OPERATION BIRTHDAY ERFINA

First of all, a happy birthday to Farah Erfina who celebrated 17 years since popping out of her mom’s. I am going to walk through her birthday celebration into some major parts.

MUMMY, I SAW TAUFIK!

Since all of us didn’t want to burn a hole in our pocket, we decided to celebrate Farah’s birthday over at Cahaya restaurant at Far East and it was quite a occasion. Firstly, we met Taufik Batisah over at the restaurant and even though Nabila wasn’t much of a fan, she got quite excited enough to speed-dial her mom say, 

“Mummy! I saw Taufik!”

Everyone found it so random and soon we were all laughing at her because the way she spoke and her small stature made her so cute.

After we knife the cake for Farah, one of the waitress at the restaurant walked over and said she couldn’t hear us sing any birthday song. After sometime, she returned to our table with another waitress and they started singing the birthday song for Farah! Then we joined in and gave the song a reasonable decibel.

HALIEJAH’S MARIJUANA

After dinner, we split into two groups - the shopping group and the chilling group. The birthday girl, Natasha, Wei Yan, two Aishas and Nabila went shopping and the rest; Me, Dhaifina, Nazrul, Haykal, Haliejah, and Helmi headed to Coffee Bean to have a drink.

During the drink, Haliejah was totally ecstatic on her Vanilla. But soon after, she died down and it was Nazrul turn. And we kind of just talked nonsense which I don’t really remember anything except the laughter.

YOUR FACE IS CACAT

 Like what I’ve said, Haliejah was ecstatic on her Marijuana. So when we were at the bus stop waiting for the bus to arrive, Haliejah and I were bickering with each other. Like her shirt color combination was shit. Like my shoe is not nice. Like her face is cacat. Like my hair is cacat. Everything is cacat.

This went on in the bus and the whole trip was something like that:

Haliejah raise her hand and was all, THIS HAND IS GOING ON YOUR FACE.

Then I would point at her head and go, THAT HEAD IS GOING OUT OF THE BUS.

Something like that.

ZUL, FARAH, AND THE WHITE UNDERWEAR

This is perhaps the most hilarious, random and unassuming part of the whole birthday adventure. We were piled up on the bus then Haliejah spotted Zul along one of the many bus stops - coincident. In the later journey, Farah suddenly recounted her moment of seeing a lady with her underwear all visible beyond her dress hems. After she was done with all the explanation and all of us trying to visualize the situation, Zul suddenly text Natasha and said:

WHEN YOU ALL ARE TALKING ABOUT WHITE UNDERWEAR, COULD YOU PLEASE LOCK YOUR PHONE?!

The thing is, Zul wasn’t on the bus and there’s no way either of us had called Zul and told him about all these White Underwear story. We all checked our call logs and we soon realized it was Natasha who had accidentally called him JUST AS WHEN Farah was talking about it.

LIKE OF ALL PEOPLE ON THIS PLANET, ZUL?!

We had a good laugh in the bus when we tried to visualize Zul on some other random bus listening to Farah’s White Underwear story and none of us would have realized if he had not text Natasha.

THE REST OF THE THINGS

Of course, among these things, we had more nonsense like how Nazrul recounted his encounter with a bunch of homosexuals who literally cat-walk on the train. Most of the time, we would be talking and one-third of the sentences that came out of our mouths were usually incomprehensible.

PICTURES OF YOU, PICTURES OF ME
The long awaited part during the PotLuck at Botanic Gardens.

We played some games involving passing around a bag with different items, we dig and then we got to do something creative with it.

While waiting for the rest to finish up their business in the toilet, which seemed like an eternity, we sat around at the entrance taking photographs like there’s no tomorrow.

Sri didn’t manage to catch all the tdbits I thrown. Neither did I catch any with my mouth when it was her turn to hurl tidbits. See that thing flying mid-air?

I was taking random photographs and Faizah, Aisha, Liyana and everyone else were enjoying Kak Sikin jokes. This is one of my favorite photograph because it kind of portray happy life with no worries.

Best group photograph yet.

And we thought the food was not enough…

See! Creative games involving some women disposal underwear!

Then comes the serious moment. We can’t afford to get lost!

Kak Sikin, should you by any chance see this, you ought to know you have really wonderful friends in Singapore and we’ll always be one big family.

This photograph is PRICELESS!